In Laws!

last night as i was having trouble sleeping suddenly, a thought came across my mind which made me lagi gila bapak susah nak sleep. What was the thought? i was thinking what will happen if i were to marry a guy yang ada siblings laki and i happen to live with my in laws. Well, definitely there is nothing wrong with it kan? i dont mind living with my in laws but if you look beyond the surface level, actually ada banyak problems. First, if my husband ada sibling laki and im living in with my in laws, tak ke saya kena pakai pakai tudung, hand socks and socks 24/7? it is not that im complaining about my obligations but try to imagine and see? it is a lot tougher than it sounds. how do i know? well, i know because bila my sister balik rumah with her husband and stay in one house then yes memang saya pakai tudung 24/7 dengan long sleeve. sebab malas nak pakai socks, saya pakai slipper barney beso yang cover my whole feet. initially memang tensions sikit la, because it is very hot and penang isnt getting any cooler in weather. But as time passes dah biasa la, but i can cope since most kena mcm tu pun like a few days, maximum a week. so still tolerable la kan? imagine if kena mcm ni life long?  And ladies, if you happen to have a boyfriend or tunang, and when this topic rise and he says, takpelah, tayah pakai tudung, yang penting niat kita kan? kita kan dah mcm family. please try to RUN as far as possible from this guy. Langsung x worth it. im saying this because aurat is part of the basics in Islam, and if he says like this about basics, how sure are you he will be a good leader? im not generalizing la, of course people change and everything but think about it...

the second thought i had ni pulak pasal living with in laws. Not all in laws kejam mcm dalam Ram Milaye Jodi, Pavitra rishta, yahan pein ghar ghar keli, Mentua vs Menantu or even Monster in laws. There are some really good in laws, i have seen them and im praying so hard that mine is one too. InsyaAllah will be. Amin. Parents, as they grow older to the level that they become grandparents, their thinking differs taw. They look at the grandchild differently as how they looked at their own child. Parents will discipline their kids but they will be as nice as possible to the grandchild because they want to be loved. Definitely we can blame them. Kalau x dengan sapa lagi our kids nak bermanja kan? but when you think deeply, it is  pretty dangerous. especially living with in laws. In laws might come across the process of parents disciplining the kids kan? kalau the parents tengah marah anak dia mesti si nenek ka datuk ka interfere cakap "ala, takpala budak kecik kan". memang lah sweet, but this interference ni will come across the disciplining kan? but of course, not all in laws macam ni, but let say out of 10 times this thing happening mesti at least sekali the parents ada tendency nak interfere kan? this thing will make the parents powerless and the kids mmg susah lagi la nak respect the parents, in not making a conclusion, im just stating the tendency of it happening.

the third thought was that generally, mother in laws, tend to look at their daughter in law as an outsiders. it is just very hard for them to take them as part of their daughters. well biasalah, out from no where pop a girl entering and living together definitely la susah nak accept kan? i admit, i might find it hard to accept jugak, but i have only one thing to point out for mother in laws out there.
whatever you expect your daughter in law to be, try to consider two things. if you think in these two things it is still ok, then yes, go ahead.

What are the two things?

one, if you are expected by your mother in law the things you expect on your daughter in law will you be ok and happy with it?

secondly, if you daughter is expected the same things by her in law, will you be ok and happy with it?

if your answer is ok for both, InsyaAllah your daughter in law will be ok with it, but of course, janganlah nak compare your hardship dengan your daughter in law punya, zaman dah berubah, teknologi pun, so mesti, your daughter in law punya life a bit better kan

but one thing for sure, Allah bagi ujian dekat semua orang ikut tahap kemampuan mereka kan?

so takdenya part "not fair".

what i have said might be true or might not be true, since human beings are not all the same, but

somehow it matches with the average ones. 

no, i didnt run any experiment to verify my smart guess.

If my mother in law is reading this and she ended up smiling, then i guess, i found my mother in law. hahaha.